What should I do?

Am I at risk?

If you’re not sure if what is happening to you is stalking then please take some time to look at the questions below:

  1. Are you very frightened?
  2. Has the person engaged in harassment before? (Involving you and/or anyone else)
  3. Has the person ever destroyed or vandalised your property?
  4. Has the person turned up at work, home, etc more than three times per week?
  5. Has the person loitered around your home, workplace etc?
  6. Has the person made any threats of physical or sexual violence?
  7. Has the person harassed any third party since the harassment began? (e.g friends, family, children, colleagues, partners or neighbours)
  8. Has the person acted violently towards other people within the current stalking incidents?
  9. Has the person persuaded other people to help him/her? (Wittingly or unwittingly).
  10. Is the person known to be abusing drugs and/or alcohol?
  11. Is the person known to have been violent in the past? (Physical or psychological)

If you’ve answered yes to any of the questions above, this indicated you should take the situation, and the person’s behaviour towards you, very seriously and contact the police for support and advice.

If you’re frightened by someone’s behaviour towards you and feel you’re in danger, call 999 now.

What should I do if I am a victim of harassment or stalking?

If you feel in immediate danger at any time always call 999. Contact the Cheshire Constabulary on 101 for other non urgent issues. Police will arrange a convenient time to meet you and take relevant details in order to give more specific safety advice to you. It is important that you tell the officer everything that has happened, even if you think it may sound trivial or alternatively you can contact the National Stalking Helpline 0300 636 0300.

How you can help yourself:

  • Take a mobile telephone with you when you go out.
  • Carry a personal attack alarm, try to alter your daily routines, ask friends to accompany you whenever possible, and always let someone know what your plans are.
  • Keep a record of what happened, where, when, every time you were followed, phoned, received post or e-mail.
  • How the offender looked or sounded, what they were wearing, the make, and number plate or colour of their car.
  • Keep letters, and parcels as evidence - even if they contain frightening or upsetting messages, do not throw them away and handle them as little as possible.
  • Keep copies of e-mails on disk and print out hard copies, do not delete the original.
  • Making notes in a diary is a good idea. Write the information down as soon as possible, when events are still fresh in your mind.
  • Tape record telephone conversations if you can and keep the tape.
  • If you recognise the handwriting, you can keep letters or parcels as evidence without having to open them.
  • Make sure you keep any stored messages (including text messages) or telephone numbers that you have received on your mobile phone and caller ID units.
  • Use 1471 on the phone and write down details of calls received, including the time received, and the telephone numbers (even unanswered calls).
  • Tell your friends, neighbours and work colleagues about what is happening.
  • Try to get photographic or video evidence of your stalker (especially if they are someone already warned by the police not to come near you).
  • Contact your telephone company to see what action they can take against malicious callers or register with Telephone Preference Service to be removed from direct marketing lists.
  • Write down information as soon as possible when events are still fresh in your mind.
  • Print pages of evidence from social networking sites and times messages were posted.

Avoiding unwanted calls:

  • Answer the phone by saying ‘hello’, not your name or number
  • Try to keep calm and not show emotion, many callers will give up if they don’t think they’re making an impression on you or your feelings
  • Use an answer machine to screen out calls and only talk to people you want to
  • If the caller rings again, put the handset down on a table for a few minutes – the caller will think you’re listening. After a few minutes replace the handset, you do not have to listen to what the caller has to say.
  • Use 1471 on the phone and write down details of calls received, including the time received, and the telephone numbers (even unanswered calls).

If you know or find out who is stalking you:

  • Do not confront your stalker or even engage them in conversation
  • Do not, under any circumstances, agree to a meeting to talk about how you feel about them constantly bothering you.
  • Do not respond in any way to calls, letters, or conversations. If you ignore the phone nine times and pick it up on the tenth, you will send the message that persistence pays. Once they have your attention, they will be encouraged to carry on.
  • Seek advice from the police, a solicitor or the National Stalking Helpline about what you should do.